Sunday, May 20, 2007
6:20 PM
today wake up at 1plus!
yesterday night sleep at 2plus.
im still sleeping!mum drag me up to accompany her go amk hub to highlight hair.i wanted too but i never.i wanted to cut hair too but never.haha.maybe next time.
still,i don't know what's love and im still making my mistake!
love a person so hard.have people love isnt a good thing too?
im sorry that i keep hurting and i shouldnt have step into a relationship when i can't give the best to anyone.i can't have two people in my life.i can't have two status with two person.nobody can accept their girlfriend or boyfriend to have another her/him.im a selfish idiot.
i feel so fuck with myself and my life.is all mess by myself.i don't wish to lose anyone.when you want somethings you have to lose somethings.even human.i don't wish to lose anything and anyone.i just wanna be close and be happy with everyone.love a person is very selfish and of cause everyone want it more.sorry that i can't give anything and im not the best and even everyone know nobody is perfect but im a damn hell bad girl.i didn't blame you my dear duncan,you are not the one who change me become lidat.yes,i do change and it was because what have happen the past but now is not.is all because of me,myself and what have been happen around.i just want it simple.chatted with weiru,still she's damn real funny son that i have.the way she message me damn cute and funny.she cheer me up after that and i laugh.take care yourself my dear son.study hard and get good result.mummy always here.thanks <3
love a person want the person happy.thanks jiayu,being with you really make me happy.i wanna be single and be happy with everyone.you respect me and you accept because you feel that as long as im happy you are happy too.this time,this moment,is also the time to think what i really want.im clear that i don't want any relationship and just wanna be close with you guys.i don't know why i love you charlotte and i still can let you go but not jiayu.as you say i don't have special feeling for you is because we understand each other and know what we want.having a status with you anot,i find it no differences.i don't know why i can't be that happy like the past.being with you that one year plus,even i like other people,my heart still have you and i can stay you by my side.but now,i know is all my mistake and my fault.i can't do it anymore.is a mistake and you let that mistake go thru because you know you can make me love you one and only one and because you are crazy about me and you love me so much thats why you wanna hold on and stay me by your side.but now,i don't think we still can.still,i hope to be close with everyone and hope when i need the person,the person can be there,when people need me,i hope i can be there too. <3i don't find it selfish having this wish?hope,is not a mistake.well,don't mistake for what i said in that sentence.that sentence is for the one which are close to me.thanks. =]]
